Under New Management

Keystones to peace, serenity, and sobriety

admin — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 13:49:18 +0000

I’m going through some real struggles in my life right now. My depression is really kicking my butt right now and I’m thirsty. I don’t plan on picking up a drink, but the urge is definitely there.

I attended a meeting this morning and we read from “As Bill Sees It”, reading #199. It talked about humility and its opposite arrogance. I realize that I can be arrogant even when I’m down on myself. Self deprecation is a form of negative pride — that I’m unworthy of love, even self-love.

I’ve been abstinent a long time, but that is not the same as sobriety. Sobriety for me is being happy joyous and free — true peace of mind. I feel that true sobriety (as I define it) is dependent upon a few “keystones” that are critical to the structure. They are: humility, acceptance, and gratitude.

When I pray in the morning for humility I have a chance. If instead I pray for strength I screw it up. My addictive mind can twist that into a spot of ego and go wild with it. Also when I fail, and I will fail in some manner as I’m human, I can use that failure as yet another way of bludgeoning myself. If instead I pray for humility I don’t have to do anything. There isn’t an expectation of success, just an expectation of being.

For acceptance I really need to read and reread the passage from AA Big Book begining on page 417 of the 4th edition (449 of the 3rd edition).

For gratitude I just need to practice it and keep a gratitude journal. I need that “attitude of gratitude”.

I hope and pray that you can have all 3 keystones today!

Willpower and motivation

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 14:51:10 +0000

I’m sitting here working from home having a difficult time getting started and staying focused. I’m going through some difficult times in my life and having a hard time staying focused. As I wrote that I’m asking myself, “Am I really going through a difficult time, or am I making it difficult?”. Well I think that I’m making it difficult.All that I need to do is to turn things over. Surrender completely to the God of my understanding. To let go of the burden of self. When I do those things, difficulty slips away. Don’t get me wrong: pain, sadness are still there, but no longer are they difficult. They just are. They no longer entrap me, when I stay focused through willpower on the present moment.When I’m focused through willpower on the present moment, I’m committing to the reality of NOW. Now is the only time there is. Passion and motivation are activated by commitment so here goes…Thanks for reading all!

Episode #039: Acceptance

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 12:26:12 +0000

#039: Acceptance
Acceptance is where I struggle in recovery. Also accepting myself as a path to forgiveness and love.
DATE: Sun, 06 Jul 2008 SIZE: 2.4 MB
Episode_039_Acceptance.mp3

Episode #038: Recovering know it all Part 2

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 12:25:17 +0000

#038: Recovering know it all Part 2
Recovering know it all Part 2. What else can I ask myself in my spiritual journey?
DATE: Sun, 11 May 2008 SIZE: 2.2 MB

Episode_038_Recovering_Know_It_All_Part2.mp3

Episode #037: Courage

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 12:22:58 +0000

#037: Courage
How I struggle with courage and my apparent lack of it.
DATE: Tue, 22 Apr 2008 SIZE: 2.5 MB
Episode_037_Courage.mp3

Episode #036: The eternity of now

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 12:21:54 +0000

#036: The eternity of now
What is the present moment? What can it mean to my sobriety and my surrender to God?
DATE: Fri, 28 Mar 2008 SIZE: 2.4 MB
Episode_036_Eternity_of_now.mp3

Episode #035: What is laughter?

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 12:20:42 +0000

#035: What is laughter?
What is laughter? How can this effect my recovery and life in general? Quote taken from “The History of the Joke”, (c) 2008 The History Channel.
DATE: Mon, 3 Mar 2008 SIZE: 2.2 MB
Episode_035_What_is_laughter.mp3

Episode #034: Ten prayers God answers

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 12:19:20 +0000

#034: Ten prayers God answers
What are the 10 prayers that God will always answer? Heard from the audiobook “The Ten Prayers God Always Answers” from Anthony DeStefano.
DATE: Wed, 13 Feb 2008 SIZE: 2.1 MB
Episode_034_Ten_prayers_God_answers.mp3

Episode #033: Garden of Success

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 03:00:06 +0000

#033: Garden of Success
How can this wonderful metaphor help me in my recovery? Heard from The Positive Mind podcast which can be found at: http://www.thepositivemind.com
DATE: Tue, 12 Feb 2008 SIZE: 1.6
Episode_033_Garden_of_Success.mp3

Episode #032: Hope

admin — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 02:58:29 +0000

#032: Hope
How can I combat my feelings of hopelessness? What can I do to seek help and healing?
DATE: Wed, 30 Jan 2008 SIZE: 4.1 MB
Episode_032_Hope.mp3